Regret
by EDD17SP
Summary: New summary: She's gone. She's gone forever. Phineas, Ferb, Candace, and Adyson all feel guilty. They're all at fault, for not seeing the reality, for not acting while they had the chance. And now she's gone. The flashbacks expose the truth, the tears reveal the guilt, and the whiskey drowns the sorrow...
1. Chapter 1

**I wrote this one by itself because I felt it did not fit in with the other stories in ****_Don't Deny It and other short Phineabella stories. _****Like many of my stories, this was inspired by a song, but it is ****_not_**** a songfic. Looking it up, there have been quite a few fan fiction stories based on this song, but none previously for Phineas and Ferb (as far as I know). So, I'm not going to tell you which song inspired this story. Let's see if anyone can correctly guess the song. I'll give you one hint: the artist who sings the song is one that has inspired previous stories of mine.**

**Anyway, this story is rather sad, and has been rated "T" for a reason. But, if I told you those reasons, it would give away the plot. So, I won't.**

**For best effect, read this story as slowly as possible.**

Twenty-five.

That was how old Isabella Garcia-Shapiro was when she died.

Phineas blamed himself. He knew it was his fault. He just couldn't believe that after everything they'd been through, the narrow escapes, the dangerous contraptions, the aliens and monsters, his best friend since childhood had succumbed to alcohol.

He felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Adyson's. Considering that they were standing just a foot away from Isabella's open casket, both were quite valiantly holding their composure. "I guess we can't be too surprised," Adyson whispered.

Phineas nodded in reply, his eyes locked on Isabella's beautiful face. Everyone else at the viewing had stated how peaceful she looked, but Phineas disagreed. She did not look peaceful at all. In all reality, she appeared exactly as she was: dead, nothing more.

"I…I just can't believe she's gone," Phineas replied.

"I know, Phineas. I can't believe it either." Adyson sighed, shaking her head. "We were blind. We should have seen the signs sooner. It's our fault she's gone."

_No. It's my fault she's gone,_ Phineas thought.

"I just doesn't seem possible that Isabella…so strong as she was…could possibly have an alcohol addiction."

Phineas disagreed. _But she didn't. She was trying to drink me away…_

* * *

_Six years ago…_

_It had taken all of Isabella's strength and bravery to ask Phineas here tonight. It had been one of the hardest things she'd ever had to do. Years of having her heart pounded on by Phineas's obliviousness had taken its toll, but her love for him only grew. The fire in her heart stung as the only boy she'd ever loved continued to turn a blind eye on her feelings. _

_But that would end tonight. No longer would she suffer in silence. She'd asked Phineas to dinner, and she was going to tell him how she felt._

_Their meal finished, the restaurant just didn't seem like the appropriate place to relay such an important secret, so they returned home, and Isabella urged Phineas into the backyard._

This is where the best moments of our life have been,_ she thought. _Right here, under this tree. Now, we will add another. I hope.

_She took a deep breath. "So, Phineas…I wanted to tell you something," she started slowly._

_In his usual cheerful tone, Phineas replied, "Sure, Isabella. Anything."_

_She inhaled deeply again. "I've been keeping this bottled up for a long time, and…I just can't keep my mouth shut any longer. I need to tell you this before…before I have a mental breakdown or something."_

_"I doubt it's that big a deal, but, okay."_

_Isabella looked into Phineas's eyes. One last deep breath. "Phineas…I'm in love with you."_

_The smile faded from Phineas's face._

* * *

Unable to tear his eyes away from the casket, Phineas took Adyson's hand, hoping that the warmth of his fiancé's skin would steady his nerves. But the touch did not help.

That was it. That was where this had started. This was why Isabella was gone.

* * *

_They stared at each other silently, their eyes locked. _

_"Phineas…?"_

_Phineas looked away. "I wish you hadn't said that, Isabella."_

_"Why?"_

_"Because…I was going to tell you tonight…I wanted your advice on what I should do…" He faced her again. "I'm in love with Adyson."_

* * *

Phineas looked around the empty room. There were a number of empty chairs and a couch, provided by the funeral home, but he and Adyson were alone. The viewing had ended an hour ago, yet he and Adyson remained.

Adyson didn't have much of a choice. Phineas was her ride. She wasn't about to leave her husband-to-be in his time of need anyway. Isabella was Phineas's best friend. He'd known Isabella even longer than she had. And she was willing to stay until Phineas was ready.

"Do you think you could let me be alone with her for a minute?" Phineas asked without averting his gaze.

Adyson gave his hand a squeeze. "Sure, Phineas. I'll be right outside." She left the room, quietly closing the doors behind her. She really wished there was something she could do to help her fiancé, to know what was on his mind.

She took a seat in a leather chair in the lobby. Everything had seemed so perfect a few days ago…

* * *

_A few days ago…_

_"Oh, Adyson, you look beautiful!"_

_The compliment came from Milly as Adyson emerged from the dressing room in a flowing white wedding dress._

_"Stunning!" Gretchen added. "Phineas is going to flip when he sees you walking down the aisle in that."_

_"Thanks," Adyson said giddily. "I still almost can't believe this is happening! I'm getting married!"_

_Holly poured a glass of champagne. "I can't believe it, either. I never would have guessed we'd be here dress shopping with you for your marriage to Phineas, instead of Isa- Ow!"_

_The exclamation was a result of being rather forcefully elbowed in the ribs by Gretchen. "She's sitting right there!" Gretchen whispered in Holly's ear._

_"And I'm close enough to hear you whispering," Isabella said. "I know what you meant. It's okay. Phineas and I just weren't meant to be. Adyson is very lucky to have him." She popped the cap on the aluminum water bottle she'd brought with her and took a long swig._

_"Thank you, Isabella," Adyson said. "You don't know what it means to me to hear you say that." She stood in front of a long mirror, admiring the dress. "Hmmm…I like it. I'm still going to try on a few more, but I'll put this one aside as a 'definite maybe.'"_

_As Adyson headed back to the dressing room, Holly turned to Isabella. "Sorry about that, Isabella. I didn't…I mean…"_

_Isabella held up her hand, silencing Holly's stuttering. "It's okay, Holly. I'm fine with it." She took another swig from her water bottle._

_Holly held out a champagne glass. "You want some?"_

_Isabella held up the aluminum bottle. "I'm good, but thanks."_

_"Come, Isabella," Gretchen said. "Have some. Live a little."_

_"That's okay." She tilted her head back and drained what liquid was left. Realizing it was empty, she put the bottle down. "Okay, maybe I will have a glass."_

Phineas sighed. He brushed the back of his hand against Isabella's cold cheek.

"I'm so sorry, Isabella. This is all my fault. I had no idea you'd take it so badly…"

* * *

_Isabella's heart felt like it had just dropped into her stomach. "You…you're in love with Adyson?"_

_Phineas rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Yeah…"_

_"Since when?"_

_"Since…uh…I don't even know. It wasn't, like, an all at once realization. It was just a thing that was quietly growing in the back of my mind for a while now…and…well…"_

_Isabella stood. There were tears beginning to moisten the corners of her eyes. Phineas saw it and gave her a rather awkward hug._

_"I'm sorry, Isabella," he said sincerely. "I had no idea."_

_She shuttered as she inhaled. "It's okay, Phineas."_

_"I doubt she has any feelings at all for me, anyway. But you and me…I…I always thought we were just friends." Isabella said nothing. "It's like we've got some kind of weird love triangle here," Phineas continued with a nervous laugh, trying unsuccessfully to lighten the moment. "You love me, I love Adyson, she doesn't love me and I don't love you. It's a love triangle where none of the sides connect."_

_Isabella slid out of his arms. She wouldn't look at him._

_"Are you okay?" Phineas asked._

_"Yeah," she replied through a few tears. "Peachy."_

_"You sure?"_

_"Uh-huh."_

_"We still friends?"_

_She nodded._

_"Okay." He gave her another quick hug. "I'm sorry, Isabella. You wanna come in?"_

_"No. I'm going home."_

_"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow."_

* * *

"But you weren't okay. And I should have known that." Phineas lightly cupped his hand around her chin. "I couldn't even tell you were still upset. Some best friend I turned out to be. I spent the last six years being just as oblivious to your feelings as I was the dozen years before that."

He looked harder at Isabella's face. "Am I a terrible person?" he asked as if she could reply to the question.

* * *

_"This is the one. Definitely this one." _

_"You're sure?"_

_"This is the one I want. Phineas is just gonna love it."_

_Adyson held her arms out and twirled around in the dress. It didn't have a long train like a traditional wedding dress, so she needn't worry about tripping._

_"Alright! We have a dress!" Gretchen announced._

_Adyson changed back into clothes and returned carrying the wedding dress in its plastic bag. "Okay. Time to write out the biggest check to pay for clothing I ever have."_

_Milly stood up from her chair. "Bet you wrote a bigger check that time we went shopping at the Superduper Mega Store."_

_Gretchen examined the tag on the plastic wrapper. "You would be wrong."_

_The girls' heads suddenly whipped around at the sound of a something falling to the carpeted floor. Isabella had stood up and tripped over her own feet, crumpling to the ground._

_"Isabella! Are you okay?" Adyson asked._

_Isabella grabbed the arm of the chair and shakily pulled herself to her feet. "Yeah, I'm…I'm good. Good, good, good."_

_Adyson raised an eyebrow. "You don't look okay."_

_"I'm fffine."_

_"Isabella…are you drunk?"_

_Isabella closed her eyes as she spoke, swaying slightly on her feet. "No. Why would I be?"_

_Adyson walked over and picked up Isabella's aluminum water bottle from where it had landed on the floor. Isabella tried to take it away from her, but Adyson spun away and popped open the top. She took a sniff of the empty bottle. "What were you drinking?"_

_"You know…liquid."_

_"Did you have…?" She sniffed again. "I don't know what, but it was strong, whatever it was."_

_"It was whiskey," Isabella suddenly admitted._

_"Whiskey? Since when do you drink whiskey?"_  
_"Since know…I mean now."_

_"This is because I'm marrying Phineas, isn't it?"_

_"Yeah…"_

_Adyson sighed. "Are you gonna be okay? Like, in the future? You've been pining over Phineas for as long as I can remember, and now he's officially off the market."_

_"Adyssson…I'll be fine. Just wallowing in the sorrow a little."_

_Adyson was not entirely convinced, but she didn't press the matter further. She just handed back the bottle and grabbed Isabella's arm to make sure she didn't trip again as they made their way to the front of the store._

* * *

"Why didn't I see it then?" Adyson asked herself aloud. There was no one there to hear her, so she had no inhibitions about talking to herself. "Why didn't I see it? I could have gotten her help."

A few past instances crept into Adyson's memory. There were a few parties and trips to bars over the years where Isabella had gone overboard, drinking until she threw up, that she could think of, but it never occurred to Adyson that Isabella had a drinking problem. Those incidents were few and far between. Everyone just assumed Isabella liked to party.

Apparently, that was not the case. It was much more serious than that.

Much more serious.

* * *

He didn't cry when he heard the news of her death. He didn't cry in the days leading up to this night. He didn't cry at the viewing. He'd held his composure long enough.

Phineas sank to his knees beside Isabella's casket and cried.

**Anybody figure out the song yet? If not, don't worry, there's going to be at least another three chapters or so.**

**I know this isn't like anything I normally write, but don't worry, there will be a classic American muscle car in a later chapter.**

**I hope you enjoyed this. Let me know what you think, and let me know if you've figured out the song that inspired this story. If no one gets it, I'll add another clue in the next chapter.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Seems Adyson has found her way into another one of my more recent stories. I guarantee, she's gonna end up with her own story sooner or later.**

**So, in the first chapter we saw Phineas and Adyson's memories of events that contributed to Isabella's death. In this chapter, we will see some moments of Isabella's life that the others are not aware of in addition to the memories of some other characters. And BTW, yes, I am doing the flashbacks out of chronological order on purpose.**

_The house seemed empty. Her mother was already asleep. It was after midnight, after all._

_Isabella closed the door to her bedroom and flopped down on her bed. She wanted to cry, and she did. She'd finally worked up the courage to tell Phineas the truth, to reveal the feelings that she'd kept to herself for so long…and he had effectively smashed her heart to pieces._

_She tried to go to sleep. But she couldn't. Eventually, she got up and wandered around the house. She tried turning on the TV, but every channel just had another sitcom, or movie, or even music video, where people, often friends, fell in love. She turned it off._

_Isabella hunted around the kitchen, looking for some comfort food, something to drown her sorrow in. Finding no ice cream in the freezer, she stared into the pantry for at while, but could find nothing of interest._

_Then her eyes fell on a glass bottle. The black label seemed to beckon her. It had been there on the bottom shelf for as long as Isabella could remember, but somehow she'd never fully realized what it was. She brought it to her face to read the label._

_It was whiskey, the seal unbroken._

_Her mother certainly didn't drink the stuff. It belonged to her late father. He'd purchased it about a week before he was killed in a car accident, and never even had a chance to open it._

_Closing the pantry, Isabella headed out to the backyard, taking the bottle with her. Laying down in the deck chair, she held the bottle on her stomach, staring at it as Phineas's words ran through her head again and again._

_"I wish you hadn't said that, Isabella…I'm in love with Adyson…I always thought we were just friends…I don't love you…"_

_Finally, the pain was too much and the temptation too great. She broke the seal and put the bottle to her lips._

_And when the sun's rays woke her the next morning, her head pounding, there was an empty whiskey bottle lying in the grass beside the chair._

Adyson parked the '69 Dodge Charger at the cemetery in line with the other cars in the funeral procession. Phineas sat in the passenger seat, his head in his hands. They'd only made it a block from their home before he'd pulled over and asked Adyson to drive. He couldn't see. The tears were blurring his vision.

She twisted the key off and the rumble of the big 383 Magnum engine was silenced. She put a hand on her fiancé's shoulder. "Phineas."

He shook his head, sobbing behind his hands.

"Phineas, we're here." He nodded, but didn't move to get out.

Adyson looked at him, tears starting to form in her eyes, too. She was starting to wonder more about Isabella's death. The autopsy had revealed intense liver damage, suggesting she'd been heavily drinking for years.

_She was trying to drink Phineas away. That's why she was drunk that day dress shopping. If she was that upset then, how must she have reacted when she first heard we were engaged?_

* * *

_Isabella locked the door behind her and rushed into the kitchen of her small apartment. Standing on the tips of her toes, she reached up above the refrigerator and brought down a clear glass bottle. Then she sank to the floor._

_She'd just heard the news. Phineas had proposed to Adyson. They were getting married. And though Isabella tried to be happy for them, it was just too painful. The only one she'd ever loved was getting married, and it wasn't to her._

_She pulled the stopper out of the bottle and tilted her head back, the amber liquid like fire in her throat. This was her attempt to let Phineas go. This was how she coped with the pain. She was going to drink away every memory of the man she loved._

_Isabella didn't want to. She had so many good memories of Phineas. She known him for so long, nearly two decades, and they'd always been best friends. All those summers they'd spent together, the adventures they'd shared…and she was going to drink those memories away._

_It was a lot to try to wipe from her mind. But she had to do it. She couldn't go on living in pain. She had to drink it all away._

_And when she pulled the bottle from her lips, she cried. She wept. For the next hour, she alternated between sobbing and getting a little bit closer to the bottom of the bottle. And when the whiskey was gone, she laid down on the hard tile floor and cried herself to sleep._

* * *

Ferb was usually very collected at funerals. It was very rare that the British man got emotional. He hadn't shed a single tear when his Aunt Tiana had lost her life two years ago after being stung by an Irukandji jellyfish. He hadn't joined his family in weeping for the death of their beloved pet platypus last year. (Surprisingly, Candace had seemed the most upset by Perry's loss.)

This time was different. He hadn't uttered a single word since hearing the news of Isabella's passing. He was so quiet anyway that only Candace noticed. At Aunt Tiana's service and the little funeral they held in the backyard for Perry, Ferb had offered words of encouragement to his friends and family who had broken down. But now, Ferb was silent. He had no reassuring words. He needed some himself, for he had collapsed to his knees at the side of Isabella's grave, tears flowing freely down his face.

There was a good reason why. Ferb was the last person to see Isabella alive…

* * *

_Ferb knocked on Isabella's door and waited. When the door slowly opened, Ferb was shocked at what he saw. _

_Isabella stood before him, her face glistening with tears, her clothing disheveled, and her hair a tangled mess. In one hand she held a waded up tissue, and in the other a half-empty bottle of whiskey._

_"Hey, Ferb," she greeted through the tears._

_"Isabella?" Ferb gasped. "What…?" He didn't know what to say. In all the years he'd known Isabella, he'd never seen her like this before._

_Isabella frowned. "Did Candace send you here?" she asked. Her sobbing had stopped and her voice was suddenly stern._

_"Well, I…yes."_

_"I told her-!" Isabella growled._

_Ferb placed a hand on her shoulder, stopping her mid-sentence. She sneered at him, her pretty blue eyes like burning coals. Ferb was actually a little bit scared. "Isabella…I…I have never seen you like this! What are you doing to yourself?"_

_"What does it look like I'm doing?! I'm crying my eyes out and drinking myself blind!"_

_"Why?"_

_"Because Phineas is getting married! And my heart feels like it's being flattened in a hydraulic press!"_

_Ferb slowly reached out and tried to take the bottle away from her, but she pulled it away. "Isabella, you have to stop. This isn't healthy."_

_As if in defiance of Ferb's words, Isabella quickly pressed the bottle to her lips and drained the rest of the bottle._

_"You can't go on like this, Isabella. You have to accept the facts and be happy for your friends."_

_"No I don't!" She yelled. "And they are NOT my friends! I hate them! Now get out of here!" And she shoved Ferb backwards. He stumbled on the stairs behind him, but Ferb was quick on his toes and managed to land on his feet at the bottom of the steps._

_"Isabella-"_

_"Go away, Ferb!"_

_He took a slow step forward. "Isabella, please…'_

_Isabella threw the empty bottle at him. Ferb ducked and heard it shatter on the sidewalk behind him. "Okay," he said, defeated. "But I will be back."_

_He turned and made his way back to the parking lot as Isabella slammed the door shut._

_And that was the last time Isabella was seen alive._

* * *

They held onto each other in the front seat of the car, which was not easy with the gearbox and shifter sticking up between them. Phineas was effectively soaking Adyson's shoulder with tears, and Adyson was likewise doing the same to Phineas's jacket.

"I shouldn't have said it," Phineas choked out. "I should've never told her I didn't love her."

"What?"

"Six years ago. I told Isabella I didn't love her. That wasn't true. I shouldn't have said that."

"But you only said it because you love me."

"But I _did_ love her," Phineas insisted. "She was like another sister to me. She was family. I loved her. I did." He suddenly squeezed Adyson's neck so hard she gagged. "Why did I say that?!" he yelled.

It took Adyson a moment to recover her voice. "Because you thought it was the right thing to say, Phineas."

He shook his head. "But it wasn't. I should have told her the truth. I should have talked to her. I could have made this right! She could still be alive right now!"

"I know, Phineas. I know." Adyson didn't know, but it was the most encouraging thing she could think of to say.

"She was my best friend! And I let her die!" He looked into Adyson's eyes. "Why did I let her die, Adyson? Why does she have to be gone?"

* * *

_Isabella picked up the empty bottle from the grass and looked at it through blurry eyes. Had it spilled into the grass when she fell asleep, or did she really drink the entire thing?_

_She slowly stood up and immediately threw up into the grass._

Oh my God! I drank that entire bottle of whiskey!

_The sun was just peeking about the horizon. It wouldn't be long before he mother arose. Quickly, Isabella stumbled over to the spigot and turned the garden hose on the puddle of vomit, washing it away. Then, her head spinning, she dragged herself back inside._

_She was heading for her bedroom to lie down, but she never made it. She tore into the bathroom and threw up again into the sink._

* * *

Candace and Jeremy stood hand in hand by the grave side, Isabella's now closed casket suspended above the freshly dug hole.

"I still can't believe she's gone," Jeremy stated simply. "I keep waiting for Isabella to walk up and say 'Whatchadoin?'" He shook his head. "It's almost too difficult to fathom."

"Ironically," Baljeet said sadly, "a fathom is exactly how far underground she will be." His words were met by blank stares. "What? Have you not heard the phrase 'six feet under?' Six feet is one fathom."

Candace closed her eyes, fighting back tears. She couldn't help but feel a little guilty about this herself. After all, she had talked to Isabella about her alcohol problem a couple months ago, right after Phineas and Adyson were engaged.

* * *

_Candace knocked on Isabella's door again. It didn't usually take Isabella this long to answer the door. She glanced at the time on her phone. _Huh. I'm not early. I honestly can't believe she isn't awake yet.

_She knocked again. After waiting another thirty seconds and still not detecting any movement from inside the apartment, Candace pulled out her keys. A few years back, Phineas and Ferb had made programmable skeleton keys for their friends so that everyone would always have a spare key to each other's homes. Buford's key was not programmed to any locks. No body trusted him enough to give him the ability to enter their home._

_Candace slowly pushed open the door. "Isabella?" she called softly. "Are you up?"_

_She shut the door behind her and crept quietly through the house, searching for Isabella. Entering the kitchen, she nearly tripped over Isabella's unconscious form._

_"Oh my God! Isabella!" Candace yelped, crouching down and shaking Isabella by the shoulder. "Isabella! Wake up!"_

_She moaned and grudgingly opened her eyes. "Candace?"_

_Candace helped Isabella to her feet, noticing the empty whiskey bottle on the floor beside the refrigerator. "Are you okay?"_

_Isabella didn't answer. Swaying on her feet, she suddenly clutched her stomach. She broke away from Candace's supporting grip and rushed for the kitchen sink. She lost her balance halfway there and fell, slamming her head into the cabinets. Realizing what was happening, Candace quickly dragged Isabella to her feet again and held back her long, dark hair so that she could vomit into the sink._

_When Candace had cleaned Isabella off, she guided her into a kitchen chair and sat down next to her. "Isabella, what…what happened?"_

_"I was…drinking last night."_

_"Why?" Isabella didn't answer, but Candace saw the tear that ran down her cheek and suddenly understood. "Because of Phineas?"_

_She nodded in reply._

_"Oh, Isabella…" Candace leaned over and wrapped Isabella in a tight hug. "I'm so sorry, Honey. I know this has to be tough."_

_"You have no idea."_

_Candace released her, but kept her hands on Isabella's shoulders. "I know. You're right. I don't. But you'll get through it. You're one of the strongest people I know."_

_"No, I'm not."_

_Candace's expression went blank. "What do you mean?"_

_"I am not strong." Her eyes fell to the bottle on the floor._

_Candace's mouth fell open as she followed Isabella's gaze. "Oh my…" She turned back. "How long?"_

_Tears were silently flowing down Isabella's face. "Since he told me…he loved her."_

_"That was, like, five or six years ago! You've been drinking like this since then?!"_

_Isabella silently nodded._

_Candace was shocked. "Oh my God," she said again. "You need to get help, Isabella!"_

_"I know…but I don't want anyone to know…see how weak I am…how much I'm hurting inside." She looked at Candace. "Please, promise me you won't tell anyone."_

_Candace knew she couldn't do that. She had to get Isabella help. "I think you need to talk to Phineas. Just Phineas, alone. Not Adyson. He needs to know."_

_"Candace, I-"_

_"You need to talk to Phineas, Isabella." She leaned closer to Isabella and looked at her hard. "If you do, and tell him the truth about how you feel-" She reached down and grabbed the empty whiskey bottle from the floor. "And tell him about __this__-" Candace slammed the bottle down against the table. "I won't say anything. But you have to tell him yourself." Isabella did not look convinced. "He will understand, Isabella. I'm not saying he's going to throw himself at you, proclaim his love, and reject Adyson, but…"_

_Isabella nodded. "Okay, Candace. I will."_

_"Thank you. Now, I came over here to see if you wanted to go shopping, but I doubt you're feeling up to it."_

_Isabella shook her head. "Everything aches." She rubbed her neck. "My neck feels like someone stepped on it."_

_"That's what happens when you sleep on a tile floor." Candace stood up and pulled Isabella with her. "C'mon. I'll help you get to bed without putting a hole in the wall with your head."_

_Candace left, her previous excitement for her brother's engagement gone, wiped away by the sight of Isabella unconscious on the kitchen floor. Maybe she would send Ferb over to talk to Isabella. He was always very level headed, and very wise for his age. It could be beneficial for Isabella to talk to him._

_But for now, she would wait, and hope that Isabella talked to Phineas. _

* * *

_A few minutes later, Isabella heard the front door close as Candace left. She waited a little longer just to make sure Candace didn't come back, and then dragged herself out of bed again. She shuffled out to the kitchen and fetched a brand new bottle of Jack Daniels from the cabinet above the fridge and then retreated to the bedroom. _

**Yup. Isabella was a wreck.**

**Here's your hint for the song of inspiration: The song is of the country genre, as are most of the songs that inspire stories of mine..**

**Yeah, so…the '69 Dodge Charger. I was going over the list of all the cars I'd used in other stories, and I realized I haven't used a single Dodge in any of my stories. I've had Plymouths, but no Dodges. Hence the Charger.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay! sydneyt6 correctly guessed that the song of inspiration for this story was "Whiskey Lullaby" by Brad Paisley. (Big surprise that another Brad Paisley song was the inspiration for one of my stories, huh? I think this is the third one.) Even if you aren't a fan of country music, I really recommend you check it out. It really is a beautiful, albeit sad, song, and not "redneck-y" at all.**

**So, this chapter is it for the flashbacks. All of the several story lines that were set in motion in the last two chapters will be resolved here, and then we will see…well, I'm not telling you exactly what yet, but, let's just say "Life after the funeral" and leave it at that. **

**BTW: Isn't that a nice picture I used for the cover? I snapped that picture of the sunset out my college dorm window.**

_Isabella hung onto the edge of the sink, her legs feeling like they were about to collapse. She desperately wanted to sit down, but she dared not stray away from the sink. She was wise to stay put, as a second later she threw up again. She could feel it burning in the back of her sinuses, the back of her throat. _

_After blowing her nose, which was rather unpleasant, she turned and sat down on the bathroom rug. And she started crying again. She felt guilty and ashamed. How could she have done that to herself? Was she really that broken up over Phineas?_

_The sounds of Vivian getting out of bed reached her ears in the silent house. She didn't want her mother to see her like this. After quickly rinsing out the sink, Isabella shuffled down the hall to her bedroom, steadying herself on the wall._

_Closing the door behind her, she stumbled to her bed and managed to get partially under the covers. She realized she was shaking, and wasn't sure if it was from the liquor or if she was cold._

_After tossing fitfully for twenty minutes, her headache seeming to only pound harder when she closed her eyes, Isabella fell asleep._

* * *

Phineas and Adyson finally managed to stop crying long enough to exit the Charger and walk the short distance to the grave. They joined what was a rather melancholy scene.

Vivian Garcia-Shapiro was sobbing loudly from her seat on a folding chair, holding a tear-soaked handkerchief to her eyes. Linda and Lawrence stood on either side of her, Linda holding one of Vivian's hands. Candace and Jeremy stood near Ferb, who was on his knees on the edge of the hole. Baljeet and his mother stood with the Hirano family, Ginger clinging tightly to Baljeet. Buford was also on his knees, directly behind the small headstone, trying very hard not to cry, yet seemed to be weeping more loudly than anyone else. Irving, Django and the other former Fireside Girls were on the opposite side of the grave in the shade cast by the willow tree a few feet away.

And Phineas and Adyson stood at the foot, hand in hand, leaning on each other's shoulders, both feeling very guilty indeed.

* * *

_Phineas, Ferb, Candace, and Adyson climbed from the Charger and headed up the walk toward Isabella's apartment. Yesterday, Ferb had had a rather unpleasant encounter with Isabella, one that ended with a large glass bottle being hurled at his head. Today, he brought his siblings and Adyson with him, hoping that together they would be able to pull Isabella out of her alcoholism. _

_Phineas pulled out his skeleton key. "Based on what Ferb said happened yesterday, I have a feeling she's not going to be very happy to see us. We'd better just walk right in."_

_"Good idea," Candace agreed. "Just knock first, just to let her know we're here."_

_"Right."_

_They crept up the stairs to the apartment and Phineas slid the key into the lock. He rapped his knuckles on the door a few times. "Isabella, it's us. We're coming in. We need to talk," he said as he unlocked the deadbolt._

_He pushed open the door and they entered the house._

_"Isabella?"_

* * *

The words and prayers spoken by the rabbi were completely lost on Candace. A good portion of it was in Hebrew and she wouldn't have understood it anyway.

The day she'd discovered Isabella unconscious on the floor had really been a sucker punch in the stomach for Candace. Especially since, years earlier, Isabella had confided in her.

* * *

_It was around quarter to 10 when Candace's cell phone rang. She had been taking advantage of not having to get up and go to work, being that it was Saturday morning, and she did not appreciate being wrenched from her blissful slumber by the bleating of her ring tone. _

_Twisting her head around, she found the other half of the bed was empty. Jeremy was already up. That was to be expected. He liked get up early on Saturdays in the summer and get a jump on the yard work before the day grew too warm._

_Moaning slightly, Candace fumbled for her phone on the nightstand and put it to her ear._

_"Hello?"_

"Candace?" _the voice on the other end asked. It was Isabella's voice, and she sounded like she was crying. _

_"Isabella?" Candace sat up slightly._

"Yeah."

_"What's wrong?"_

_There were a few sniffles on the other end before Isabella answered._

"I did a bad thing. And…I need someone to talk to."

_"How bad we talkin' here?" Candace asked as she tossed off the comforter and swung her feet to the floor._

"Bad. Real bad. My mom just left. Can you come over?"

_"Sure. I'll be there in fifteen minutes."_

_Candace dressed, brushed her teeth, and drove to Isabella's house in twelve minutes flat. The front door opened before Candace could knock. Two things caught her attention:_

_The first was Isabella's hair, which was rather tangled and messy. The second were Isabella's eyes, which were red-rimmed and puffy from crying, and they capped long, glistening streaks that stretched down her cheeks._

_"Hi, Candace," she greeted sadly._

_"Isabella!" Candace quickly entered the house, closing the door behind her. "What happened?"_

_Isabella sniffled. "I…I did a bad thing…"_

_Candace put an arm around her friend, cutting her off, and pushed her into the living room to sit down on the couch. "Okay, what happened?"_

_Through progressively worsening sobs and at least half a box of tissues, Isabella told Candace her story, starting with Phineas, the bottle of whiskey, and ending with the puking._

_"Oh, Isabella, you poor thing." Candace wrapped Isabella in a tight hug. "You've had a rough couple of hours, huh?"_

_"Yeah…" Isabella leaned backwards just far enough to see Candace's face. "Did I do the wrong thing?"_

_"I think, under the circumstances, you were entitled," Candace said. "But don't make a habit out of this. It happened. You can't change it now. Just don't do it again. Besides, you and Phineas have a very strong friendship. I'm sure you guys will be just fine. If Ferb were here, I'm sure he'd say something like 'They say time heals all wounds' or something."_

_Isabella managed a small chuckle. "You do not do a very good impression of Ferb."_

_"I know I don't. Now, go get a brush so I can fix your hair…"_

* * *

"If only I'd paid more attention after that," Candace whispered under her breath. "I might have seen the truth."

With the casket resting in the bottom of the grave, the rabbi invited everyone to toss in a handful of dirt. Everyone seemed reluctant to move from where they stood, their eyes watching Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro, waiting for her to go first. Vivian didn't appear ready to move from the chair anytime soon, and she was now crying louder than she had all day.

So, Linda went first, taking a small handful of loose dirt from the pile nearby and tossing it gently into the hole. Lawrence followed her lead, as did the rest of the adults. Baljeet and Ginger, still clinging tightly to each other, were the first of Isabella's old friends to make their way to the dirt pile and take their turn.

When he was finished, Baljeet laid a gentle hand on Buford's shoulder. The big man hadn't even looked up from his weeping long enough to realize what the others were doing, but he looked up at Baljeet. No words were needed for the message to pass between the old friends. Baljeet took his hand and helped Buford to his feet, and then they shared a comforting hug before Buford scooped up as much soil as he could in his beefy hands and dropped the large load into the hole. It was exactly the kind of thing the gang would expect from him, and everyone silently agreed that Isabella would have appreciated the gesture.

_The living room showed no signs of life. The four made their way into the kitchen. _

_"Isabella?" Adyson called in a low voice, but there was no reply. They found it strange that she hadn't at least called out to them in reply._

_The kitchen was empty, too. Phineas suddenly felt a pang in his chest. He had the unmistakable feeling that something was wrong. They'd seen her car outside, so they knew she was here, yet she hadn't responded to their presence._

_All four pairs of eyes met. They only place they hadn't checked was the bedroom. Words were not necessary to convey the message._

_They headed down the short hallway to Isabella's bedroom, Ferb in the lead._

_He opened the door._

* * *

Adyson scooped up a handful of dirt and threw it into the hole. "I'm sorry, Isabella," she whispered.

* * *

_Isabella lay face down on the unkempt bed, her lifeless fingers still wrapped around a half-full bottle. There were at least half a dozen empty Jack Daniels bottles both on the floor and on the bed. _

_Phineas, Ferb, Candace, and Adyson stepped lightly into the room, their footsteps creaking on the floorboards the only sounds._

_"Isabella?" Phineas said slowly, fear rising in his voice. Reaching the bedside, he shook her arm, trying to rouse her. "Isabella?"_

* * *

Jeremy and Candace relinquished their grip on each other as they made their way over to the dirt pile. Jeremy went first. Then Candace followed.

Tears dripped off of Candace's chin and mixed with the earth that she dropped onto the casket of her friend. "I'm sorry, Isabella," she whispered.

* * *

_Phineas shook her arm a little harder. "Isabella!" _

_The shaking caused her arms to shift, revealing her left hand. In it, she clutched a serrated kitchen knife._

_And then, they noticed the blood on the sheets._

* * *

Ferb couldn't bring himself to stand. He tried, but his legs just refused to support him as he continued to sob into the grave.

He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up. Candace stood beside him, holding another handful of dirt. She held her hand out to him. He cupped his hands and she transferred the soil to him.

He dropped it into the hole. "I'm sorry, Isabella," he whispered.

* * *

_The knife wasn't the sharp kind. It was a standard cheap kitchen knife, not much good for slicing through anything with ease. But, with just a little force it could more or less scratch the skin. _

_Isabella had taken the knife to both arms. She hadn't severed any arteries. She hadn't even cut very deep, just barely deep enough to draw blood. It wasn't what killed her._

_The fact that Isabella had done such a thing to herself was not what shocked Phineas. It was what she had turned the scratches into._

_On her right arm, she had scratched the words I WILL LOVE HIM and on her left TILL MY LAST BREATH._

* * *

Phineas finally stepped forward. He was the last one.

* * *

_"Call 9-1-1!" Phineas yelled. Candace had her cell phone out in an instant and rushed from the room as she dialed. _

_"Isabella! Isabella, wake up! Don't you do this to me!"_

* * *

He scooped up a handful of dirt.

* * *

_"Isabella! Isabella!"_

_Adyson and Ferb joined Phineas at the bedside. Adyson quickly felt for Isabella's pulse._

_"Isabella! Wake up, Isabella! WAKE UP!"_  
_Adyson looked at Ferb. She slowly shook her head._

* * *

He stared into the grave, squeezing the earth he held in his hand, feeling like he was going to choke on his tears.

* * *

_"Isabella! Isabella!"_

_"Phineas-" Adyson started._

_"What?!"_

_Ferb gently pushed Phineas's hand from Isabella's shoulder where he'd been shaking the girl. Phineas looked at him, and the step-brothers' eyes met. "She's gone, Phineas."_

* * *

He'd been standing motionless, staring into the hole for what seemed like forever. He could not bring himself to open his hand and let the dirt fall. To do so was to bury his best friend, something Phineas did not want to do. He couldn't do it.

Then he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Candace's. Adyson walked up on his opposite side and took his free hand. He squeezed that hand hard, trying to draw strength from it.

Phineas took a deep breath and let the dirt fall.

* * *

_Phineas sank to his knees, his eyes locked on the dead body of his best friend. He took her cold hand and closed his eyes. But he did not cry. _

_He stayed like that until the paramedics arrived, and even then he walked with them out to the ambulance, refusing to relinquish his grip on Isabella's hand._

_Adyson and Ferb were left alone. Adyson sighed. "Well…she did it."_

_Ferb looked confused until Adyson continued._

_"After six years, she finally drank him away." _

* * *

Phineas pulled the car door shut, staring blankly out the window at Isabella's now fully filled in grave. A moment later, he heard the driver's door open and close as Adyson climbed behind the wheel. A second after that, the big Mopar engine growled to life.

Phineas closed his eyes as Adyson shifted into first gear. He had no voice left with which to speak, but as they drove away he mouthed the words, "I love you, Isabella."

**I shed quite a few tears writing the second half of this chapter. That was not easy. (It didn't help that I was listening to the song at the same time.)**

**Just to clarify on that last line: Phineas saying those words does not mean he does not still love Adyson, nor does it mean that he is in love with Isabella. It was just to make up for not ever telling her that he loved her like family, for telling her he did not love her.**

**Please review! More to come soon.**


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